Nicholas, I have trouble believing in two major facts about life: birth and death. The real facts of life, it seems to me, are love, work, and running errands. Plus, being a believer or non-believer. And going to the beach, etc. The idea that people vanish seems utterly implausible to me. The idea that people […] Read More

Dear Nicholas, Without deciding to, I seem to be neglecting my most-cherished bad habits, at least for the moment. I’m amazed. Usually, to make a change like this, I have to decide to do it, suffer in the process, and give myself rewards for sticking to my resolve. Most dramatically, it has been ten days […] Read More

Nicholas, In the flurry of book promotion three years ago when Cobalt Blue came out, I dreamed up a fabulous idea: write a sales rap for all my books. Make a rap video. I was so excited. I wrote the lyrics. I’ve been making pathetic attempts to rap ever since. I was advised from the […] Read More

Nicholas, Writing these notes to you makes me see my life/self a little differently. The experience is a lot like keeping a journal in the three months I spent in Varanasi doing research for my novel Sister India. Then I was writing what I felt/thought/observed hour by hour, to have the tastes and smells of […] Read More

Nicholas, An update, how several recent emotional sagas ended. Or at least paused. Last week I posted Feeling Worthless. That depressive dip passed within 24 hours, aided by 14 hours of sleep. Now I feel Very Worthwhile. Bob continues to recover impressively well from his six-month series of serious health whammies . He works, works out, […] Read More

Nicholas, I’m told it’s a bad idea to blog about feeling worthless. I agree. I’m doing it anyway. This is not a ploy to get people to say encouraging things to me. Nothing anybody could say would help. I have no excuse for this terrible mood. Quite the reverse. I went with Bob today for […] Read More

Nicholas, I said to you once, “I am so welded to Bob.” You said, “I know.” What did we mean by that, I wonder? It’s more than love. More than commitment. It seems to be a biological fact. Like my having two arms. Not sure when this happened. I know we’d been married two years […] Read More

Dear Nicholas, Monday night was the fifth rush to the Emergency Room entrance for one or another of my family in a mere six months. You might think that I’d start to know the drill, but this time in spite of my best efforts, I’m holding up a little less well. My spirits are excellent […] Read More

Dear Nicholas, Thirty-six years ago you and I had an 11-session conversation in which I “got in touch with my feelings.” I got quick and dramatic results from this change: I started writing fiction, I fell in love and got happily married, and I became a problem for area dentists. Before the “feelings” turning point, […] Read More

Nicholas, A change! In the months I’ve been looking after ailing and endangered loved ones, I haven’t fallen into the state of mind I call “tired of myself.” At times in the past, I’ve felt hemmed-in and trapped inside my own personality and set of quirks and ambitions and repeating thoughts. Sort of like being […] Read More