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Cobalt Blue: A Novel

A novel for courageous readers and seekers, COBALT BLUE is a turbulent, gorgeous ride into sacred sex..

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A Mr. Rogers Type Solution to Depression (and Everything Else)

January 11, 2020
Nicholas — Okay, I’m a little depressed over Husband Bob’s ongoing health misadventures. Even though I know he’s not in mortal danger, any more than we all are, I still find myself a little low. And today I had a thought that helps. For me it’s at least a partial solution to depression, inspired by […] Read More

all's forgiven, flawless life

All’s Forgiven?

January 7, 2020
Dear Nicholas, What two words do you wish you could have told your younger self? That’s the question of a mini-quiz floating around online. The two words that I quickly chose are: all’s well. I’ve thought about that some more. I’m also tempted by: all’s forgiven. If I thought that all were forgiven (and some […] Read More

emotional jolt

The Emotional Jolt of Sudden Change

December 18, 2019
Dear Nicholas, Compared to a death or winning the lottery, this wasn’t a huge emotional jolt. But still, it felt like the jarring of the spine that happens when you expect there to be one more step down and there isn’t. Instead, foot hits floor sooner and faster than expected. What Happened Husband Bob was […] Read More

Fresh Resolve: Create Beauty

December 12, 2019
Dear Nicholas, Here at the busiest time of year, I’ve come upon a new mantra, a fresh resolve: “create beauty.” It emerged from an online course of sorts that I signed up for about a year ago, called Clearing Physical and Emotional Clutter ¬†taught by Stephanie Bennett Vogt. This clearing seemed to me a good […] Read More

revealing final words

Revealing Final Words

November 16, 2019
Dear Nicholas, Some years back in a family sit-around, several of my folks were engaging in gallows humor about what word or phrase we’d used so much that we’d wind up repeating it when we were ancient and vacant-minded. In effect, our revealing final words. My brother Franc who was in the clothing business, said […] Read More

awed by saltwater

Awed By Saltwater: That Oceanic Feeling

November 5, 2019
Dear Nicholas, I’ve always been awed by saltwater. Awe on the open ocean–there’s no better place for astonishment and deep trance. Likely one reason I’m writing a biography of a woman who spent childhood years on her father’s sailing ship. And why I needed ocean sailing for my research. (This biography is now half spiritual […] Read More

awe wonder water

Awe Wonder Water

October 22, 2019
Had me a little adventure, Doc! I went to sea on a sailing ship to try to understand the three-part concept that I think of as “Awe Wonder Water.” It was a research trip. The book I’m working on is about a woman who spent six years of her childhood living on her father’s 19th […] Read More

Who’m I Gonna Call? Jesus and Daddy, Though I’m a Pagan Christian

October 4, 2019
Dear Nicholas, Who of the dead and gone would I most like to talk with? That was the question asked of the three writers on a recent panel at a local library. I hesitated for a quarter-second, though, pagan Christian that I am, I’d known instantly my answer: “Jesus and Daddy.” It wasn’t the expected […] Read More

japanese bamboo grass

Nature Is Winning at My House

September 17, 2019
Dear Nicholas, Yesterday in the hellish heat I ventured again into my jungle of a garden and found it overwhelming. Nature is winning on this little patch, a lot more vigorously than usual. The ground is squishy with vole tunnels. There must be thousands of the little creatures swarming under there, eating plants from the […] Read More

math anxiety

What’s With My Lifelong Fear of Math?

September 5, 2019
Dear Nicholas, Why should I or anyone have a lifelong fear of math? “Feel the fear and do it anyway” doesn’t work, at least not for me. Yesterday I included two bills with a bank deposit, a twenty and a ten. The teller at the drive-through had to tell me that twenty plus ten does […] Read More