Riding with the Brake On: The Habit of Hesitation
On almost any day, I can feel the pressure of the parking brake dragging on my soul when I have my first look at my email inbox. Then the decision-making process begins. Which item will be easiest to take care of? Which will be quickest? Which will be juicy and interesting? Which should I stare at half a dozen times before taking any action?
Perhaps you've had a similar experience. I notice it also crops up with to-do lists. I often wait until later in the day to tackle the trickier matters, because by then I'll be a better person and have a wealth of time and wisdom.
(writing interrupted by falling asleep at the computer)
So, what is it about The Thing That Needs To Be Done?
For me, probably it's that I don't like some Thing bossing me around like that. So it can just wait.
Or as Bernard Golden puts it in a favorite book of mine: "No one is going to tell me what to do — including myself."
Also, if it needs to be done, it must be important; and I may not be up to it yet. Four or five hours from now, I surely will be.
I always always always feel good when the Thing is done. So, why don't I learn to jump into it first thing? After all, this has been going on for 64 years.
Will I be hesitating for hours at 90? Waiting to be better equipped and more in charge?
It's not a matter of whether stuff gets done; I do it and generally the same day. But what a waste to be so often pushing against the parking brake.
I've nattered about this here before, which didn't solve the problem.
Perhaps I'll devise a Brake Release Ceremony.